Monday, October 20, 2008

Joke of the Week....

I thought I would Post a Court Joke because of my last post :)

A man called to testify at the Internal Revenue Service (IRS), asked his accountant for advice on what to wear.

"Wear your shabbiest clothing. Let him think you are a pauper," the accountant replied.

Then he asked his lawyer the same question, but got the opposite advice. "Do not let them intimidate you. Wear your most elegant suit and tie."

Confused, the man went to his Priest, told him of the conflicting advice, and requested some resolution of the dilemma.

"Let me tell you a story," replied the Priest.

"A woman, about to be married, asked her mother what to wear on her wedding night. 'Wear a heavy, long, flannel nightgown that goes right up to your neck.' But when she asked her best friend, she got conflicting advice. Wear your most sexy negligee, with a V neck right down to your navel."

The man protested: "What does all this have to do with my problem with the IRS?!"

"Simple", replied the Priest...

"It doesn't matter what you wear, you are going to get screwed!"

Tuesday, October 07, 2008

Nik goes to Court

Funny thing that....

Lets start from the beginning. As most of my blogger friend know I work at a Apple Computer store called Macdocs. We have a lot of unsavory characters that always try and take advantage of the small business that we are. As try to get things for free. We take a lot of measures to make sure that we don't get ripped off.

When I first started working at Macdocs there was a Gentlemen that came into buy a few things....about 6k worth of things. He wanted to pay with an Out of State check so I went to my Manager and asked him what to do. He said just take the check and everything will be fine. Well it was a bad check. We both got written up for it and well if caused a lot of heart ache.

Unfortunately stuff like this happens a lot. But because this was a first offence and they made such a big deal out of it I have always remembered this specific case. I will not say his name or anything in fairness.

Well about 2 weeks ago my boss Russ opened some mail and I have been sapena'd and I have to appear in court. He commented that it was for Mr. Criminal and I immediatly said I think that was the guy from when I first worked here. He agreed and I did not think much more about it.

When I got to work today bright and early for the meeting I recieved a call from Russ. He said "Nik I am down at the court house and they lawyer said he wants you to come down here and testify." I mentioned my concern that I need my hours to get paid but if they want me to I will. He called back to say that I have a Sapena on me as well but they sent it to my old address. He came a picked me up and I went a few blocks down to the court house.

After we got through Airport Security I went to the Court Room and waited for the trial to start. It was like a fast food court process. There was maybe 3 other cases that the Judge did quickly. One dude pleaded guilty to charges of having Child Porn on his laptop. There was a Woman who wanted to change her name and another woman for something I could not hear. At that time the lawyer came over to us and mentioned that had plead no contest and that we could go home if we wanted we decided to stay and see if.

He came out in his Shackles and it gave me a small sense of pleasure to see him all tied up and in a prison jump suit. The judge said that they would schedule another hearing and that was the end.

The lawyer said the Defence was going to try a defence that stated he was "insane and could not write good checks" but I think they are grasping at straws with that one.

So I may need to appear in court later this month but I thought I would share my entertaining day with you all!